Phil 4:7

Damai sejahtera Allah, yang melampaui segala akal, akan memelihara hati dan pikiranmu dalam Kristus Yesus.

平安来自上帝，这是凡人所不能理解的，

这平安会在基督耶稣里保护你们的心灵和意念。

the Strength.

The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save.

He will take great delight in you,

he will quiet you with his love,

he will rejoice over you with singing.

Zephaniah 3:17

The Passion of Mary-Margaret. I call it the nun-book. hehe. it's not exactly a 'nun'-book but a fictional story about this religious sister named Mary-Margaret. A story about how she wanted to live her whole life serving God as a sister but then end up leaving the order and got married to her old time crush who became a male prostitute+drug addict........ haih, long story. :p

It's something like The Shack book. not the story line. but the moral of the story.

Although it's fictional, i couldn't help but thinking there must be someone in this world living out this kind of life - dedicate her life to God, serving Him wholeheartedly.

I kind of felt the goosebumps when i just started to read the book, especially when it comes to those lines describing why and how she wants to live her life for God, blah blah blah. How can she love her God to that extend? Don't we have the same God? How is she able to turn the bitterness in life into something that spurs her to continue her walk with God? As i continued reading the book.. she has Jesus as her Friend and she knows God loves her and she has no doubt of that.

I met up with a friend today. Although she did the talking most of the time, it was good. i have great respect for her tenacity in life, her passion for God, etc etc. she pointed out one thing - how we think of God shapes how we love God and the quality of relationship we have with God.

That's a pretty 'something' for me to think and work through.

We all like to decide our own sacrifices.

That's the mistake i always make.

fictional, yet real.

I need Strength to carry on.

even though you can't see.

even though you can't feel.

a choice

Father, if you are willing,
take this cup from me;
yet not my will,
but yours be done!
Luke 22:42

what does He require of me?

He has showed you, o man, what is good.
And what does
the LORD require of you?

To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God.
Micah 6:8

On a Sunday evening

'Do you think the way to tell the story of the Christian way is to describe its trials and tribulations? It is not. It is to name and describe the God who preserves, accompanies and rules us' - Eugene Peterson, The Journey.

Ebenezer.

Different ones of us have our own stories to tell. I have finished my second month in LD. And I am beginning to go thru' days 'one-month-at-a-time'. I count it as an achievement, a great leap from being stuck at 'one-week-at-a-time' for almost two months.

Because You're with me, I will not fear.

This afternoon I heard the tune of Amazing Grace. I woke up and realised that it came from my dream.

'Grace does not depend on suffering to exist, but where there is suffering you will find grace in many facets and colours' - William Young, The Shack.

I have to constantly remind myself how i worked through the struggles and difficulties for the past 4 years that led me to where i am this day, lest I got entangled in the jimo-ness of being far away from the other side of my world and ensnared by the disillusionment which comes when things do not turn out the way we(i) wanted it to be.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than you ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."

I am still living like a 'tourist' in LD, as if i am doing a long term teaching practice in a place very far away from UM. It feels weird to be in a place foreign to you. A stranger on that place, no matter how long you are there or how familiar you become with that place. You know you don't belong there and you yearn to be back Home.

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

Sometimes you can't help but wonder how some people go through days doing their tasks halfheartedly. They expect people to take over their task, to cover for them whatever that was left out. They pay no attention to important things, yet they are always so into making sure that the trivial and menial stuff is ok.

Do not judge, or you too will be judge. The speck of sawdust in their eyes and the plank of wood in my own eye.

and

Where do you spend most of your time in your mind, in your imagination, in the present, in the past, or in the future? my jimo-ness caused me to spend a lot of time in the past. my anxiousness and the desire to be in control of situations caused me to spend too much time in the future. Am i really living in the present?

As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands. Instead of thornbush will grow the pine tree and instead of briers the myrtle will grow. This will be for the LORD's renown, for an everlasting sign which will not be destroyed.

this is how it has to be.

it's February!

i am leaving ipoh at 4am tonight, i mean 'tomorrow morning'.

and soon i will be back in the other side of my world. it's been a good one week break back in Ipoh. and i am looking forward to the mid year holidays in May-June.

what's awaiting me in LD?
basketball practices and competition. HKSBP. classes. moving to another unit one floor below the current one. school sports day. have to settle the Feb math test problem. have to key in the marks of Feb test for bio, science and math. settle the PEKA filing stuff. what else? erm, get the tickets to fly back for holidays! ;)

i don't know how am i going to do this kind of traveling for 4-5 years. *hopefully not more than that*

sometimes i wonder how am i going to face all that is coming.. how am i going to keep the enthusiasm and passion to teach.. how can i keep myself from disillusionment.. how can i keep myself from being so affected by the working environment.. how can i keep walking along this path and not be influenced by the one-of-a-kind attitude which we all know so well when we talk about teachers in school.. how? how not to be overwhelmed by so many 'hows' and 'don't-knows' and 'whys'?

Psalm 37.

Trust in the LORD and do good;
dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
Delight yourself in the LORD
and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the LORD;
trust in him and he will do this:
He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn,
the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.
Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him....
.........

it's going to be an eventful three months in LD with more stories to tell in the blog as i plugged myself in to the life in LD and when you see me face to face during the mid year break. there will be more building-bridges-crossing-cultures stuff to work on and creating opportunities of coming together building each other.

i missed my uni days
happy birthday, jiaaaaa!

ups and downs

Faith never knows where it is being led,
but it knows and loves the One who is leading.
- Oswald Chambers

gain and forfeit

This whole week has been filled with meetings and basketball trainings in the afternoon. The training - so far so good, I go there to oversee je, since I still don't know much about training people for basketball competition bah.. sheeeshh

Classes -- it's quite tough to teach the kids bio because language is really a problem to them. I let them tried some objective questions and the best score was 20 out of 35 correct, which is actually quite low. Maths - alright, i think i did go too fast in some parts and therefore i am now slowing down and preparing them for the Feb test. Science - boleh tahan la, although one of the classes is a bit slow but still can cope. The principal will be coming in to observe me teaching next friday. adui. and then have to be observed by ketua panita and ketua bidang for all the subjects i teach. *pengsan*

This weekend i am going to cook pasta again. My housemate and i actually came out with a menu.. well, soon i can open a restaurant. :p bought some cockroach-lizard traps and it worked. A lizard was trapped and the ants that come after the dead lizard were also trapped coz' it works like the fly paper. They are stuck on the trap.. *sticky sticky*

Had a mini discussion with my form 4 kids on 'what does it mean to be successful'. One boy mentioned 'Beriman' and that sparked off this verse on my mind and i wrote it on the board.

What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul?

and this verse really got them thinking.

including me.

truth vs sham

we like lies
because lies approve the sham we are living.
~Rev. Jeyakumar~

I AM the Way, the Truth, and the Life.
No one comes to the Father except through Me.
John 14:7

Emmanuel

the Bug and the Advent and the Christmas

*can't you see that i'm busy?*

it's a pleasant surprise when i checked the picture.
the bug so happened flew pass as i pressed the shutter.
*teeheeee*

they said the 'list' is coming out in a few days time. Thursday, they said.
and i don't know what to expect. *whatever*

***
'Notoriously JOY-ed!'

The Advent.
Are you living as if Jesus did not come and is not coming again?
***

my family and i had a good laugh when we talked about many years ago how me and my siblings used to wait for Santa Claus to come during Christmas. We put baskets at the end of our beds, we 'fought' for the biggest basket...(you know, let's say you have a small basket, then Santa initially thought of giving you a big gift since you behaved well thru'out the year and mana tahu he had to give you a smaller gift coz the big one can't fit into your small basket...) hehe, and we did receive gifts from Santa@my parents. LOL. they are really good in creeping into rooms. Oh well, and now you know SIZE (of the basket) doesn't really matter anyway.

at the mean time.. while waiting for this Thursday to come...

life is the same ~ back to peeling garlic and being a waitress..
and acting like a boss.
*_*

oh You

without You my world slips away

The things of this world will fade
Still You are all that i need

let's walk together

what if you have to walk alone?

Where i lose myself
i will find You're all i need

David and Jonathan

i have been thinking about them for many days.

there's a lot of things in my mind but as usual... i don't know how to sort them out .. let alone voicing them out.

my mind is stuffed with many 'why?'s
but He said,

Peace I leave with you;
my peace I give you.
I do not give to you as the world gives.
Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
John 14:27

and therefore I will be up in Haven for 3 days 2 nights searching for Peace.

remind me

how You found me in that very same place

how You saw me through the eyes of Your grace

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
Phil 4 : 6-7

salt and light.

you are the salt of the earth and the light of the world.

***

Teachers are like street lights along the road.
They don't make the distance any shorter
but they light up the path
and make the walk to success worthwhile.

time.

with God all things are possible.
Matt 19:26

this is the first thing that caught my attention 7 years ago.

**
timing.
perhaps it was a wrong timing.
disappointed i am
but i don't want to make things worse.

**
first week in school.
it was cool
and
somewhat *awesome*
geo challenge is a useful tool to be used during relief classes.

**
shifted out from 3rd.
the jimoness is indescribable.
i felt that i have just moved in to 3rd not long ago and now i have to move out.
packed. unpacked. packed. unpacked.

**

no regrets.

excited? nervous?

i'll be heading to school

in less than 9 hours.
;)

a good friend said:

hey, don't get so stressed.
in all your ways ACKNOWLEDGE God,
and He will make your paths straight.

then my mum said:

mum: wah, you very 'gan cheong' (translate: nervous) ar?
me: of coz 'gan cheong' (translate: nervous like sh*t) la.....!

it was funny how my mum in her laughing-teasing tone then told me "mou gan cheong.. mou gan cheong (translate: don't be nervous) and go sleep early....."

sheesh... still got mood to blog.. garhh...

i was restless and i played many rounds of pacman to destress myself. then i figured out that i should go read the bible instead. :p

PJK has been preaching about "Not by might nor by power, but by the Spirit of God". what a reminder i get week after week that it's not by my might or power or wisdom or understanding.. but by the Spirit of God going before me and with me... hmmmmmm...

and....

"You spent 4 years studying to be a teacher. you BE a teacher," babe*.
;p